Yesterday I was in a bad mood. Seriously, just ask my mother in law. I'm not sure what it was but I think everything caught up to me: 3rd admission to Hopkins, lack of sleep, changing floors, etc. Thankfully, I woke up this morning a bit more refreshed from a good night's sleep and came in to see a happy kiddo. I love that boy's smile. And his hugs!
We just missed the doctors rounding this morning so I'm not sure what the game plan is. Or if there even is one. As of yesterday, because Rambo has now changed hands of who is attending him, the original plan of coming home on the vent has gone out the window. Or at least has been way layed for now. (I'm actually not even sure if that's the correct term, but it sounded right in my head...). The pulmonary doc in charge isn't too keen on the idea of Rambo being home on a vent at night. I'm not sure what that's going to mean in the long run. But for now they need to observe him, collect data, etc and come up with a plan.
I hope I'm not getting ahead of myself. I just realized I may not have explained why this option of being on a vent at night is even up for discussion. From what we can tell, mainly because this is his third admission, it appears that he has not fully recovered from the original virus he had about two months ago. Put a beast of a virus on top of already not great lungs and this is what you come out with: a long recovery. So the question now is, how long of a recovery?
So that's where we are. Hopefully coming up with a plan that works for everyone. And by everyone I mean mainly us as a whole family-at least in my opinion that's all that matters. If I had to guess I'd say that we are looking at a few more weeks here. Anything is possible but that would be my educated guess at this point.
We are waiting in the unknown at this point. Again. I am thankful that he is doing well and acting like himself. I'm struggling with the fact that being on a vent at night might be his new normal and from being away from my family again.
This is the Blessed Life- not anxious to see far in front, nor careful about the next step, not eager to choose the path, nor weighted with the heavy responsibilities of the future, but quietly following behind the Shepherd, one step at a time.
So here's to today (as I raise my cup of coffee). Only today.