Saturday, May 4, 2019

scars

I attended a funeral today. A father to one of my best friends. It's true that I didn't know the man well. Listening to his children speak today, however, made one thing clear: we all have scars. And that somehow binds us all.

I've had my fair share of pain. The brokenness of this world has broken me. And I could list a thousand reasons why I'm not thankful for that; why it makes me angry or sad or hurt... still. I could easily recall how lost and empty I felt. I could still cry.

But... I can list one and ONLY one why I am thankful for the scars: because without them I wouldn't know who Jesus is. Who He REALLY is.

This doesn't dull the pain. And it doesn't nullify it, either. But it has somehow, finally, made it okay. I know, without a doubt, that I have known Jesus in His suffering... in my suffering. And He was there. We were bound before by His infinite mercy and sacrifice, but we are now doubly bound by His compassion and care over me.

My friend's father started a legacy of family and has left them to continue that. And they will. I can't help but wonder if that legacy would have been as strong without the hardships.

Those thousand reasons can bombard me on a daily basis, but when I let that one breathe.... when I give it just enough oxygen to survive - it's enough. On the cross Jesus gave us a legacy of love. A legacy that we get to partake in and carry on. Hardships, hurts, scars... they make it stronger, they bind us.

"I'm thankful for the scars
'Cause without them I wouldn't know Your heart.
And I know they'll always tell of who You are
So forever I am thankful for the scars."

Wednesday, February 6, 2019

Like.....so much.

Some days I wonder how much I really love my children. And then there are days I spend literal HOURS working on 16 feet of tangled and knotted room decor:


And I realize that I love them, like, so much. 

So, yeah, I've pretty much got this parenting thing down.